|
|
Alcohol all the way- submitted by Ian.
The FDA is considering additional
warnings on beer and alcohol
containers. Some of the suggestions are as follows:
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may make you think you are
whispering when you are not.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an
asshole.
same boring story over and over again until your friends want to
SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay
shings likethish.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may lead you to believe that
ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4:00 AM.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants, and or underwear.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may cause you to roll over
in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and/or
name you can't remember).
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
is the leading cause of
inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that
you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really
big guy nicknamed Meat.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may lead you to believe you are
invisible.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may lead you to think people
are laughing with you.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may cause you to say things
you really don't mean (i.e.. I love
you, I hate you, I want to have sex with you)
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol
may cause an influx in the
time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of
time may seem to disappear.
WARNING, the consumption of alcohol may actually cause pregnancy.
To go back to the main page click Here